The Trap of Hyped Up

This morning, I woke up to a text from my sister describing our brother's latest drinking episode. Immediately my body responded—heart racing, jaw clenching, mind spinning with what I should do. Within minutes, I was completely hyped up, planning interventions, rehearsing conversations, and strategizing solutions. Then I caught myself.

This state of agitation isn't a strategy; it's a trap. It masquerades as productive energy, convincing me that if I just worry enough, think enough, or plan enough, I can alter someone else’s path. The reality, however, is that this hyped-up feeling consumes my vital energy, diverts my focus from my own life, and ultimately changes nothing about their situation. It’s a familiar, almost comfortable, intensity that offers an illusion of control, making me feel involved, important, and necessary. But my brother's journey with alcohol will unfold whether I'm churning with anxiety or not. My agitation doesn’t help him, and it certainly doesn't help me.

Now, when that familiar surge begins, I recognize it as a signal, a warning sign. This is the moment I tend to lose myself in someone else’s disease, abandoning my own serenity for the illusion that my heightened state can somehow influence the uncontrollable. The trap of getting hyped up is always present, but I don't have to step into it. I can choose a different path.

Today, when I feel myself getting agitated, I will pause, acknowledge the trap, and redirect my energy to things I can control, like my own boundaries, my reactions, or seeking support from my sponsor.