Footbridge over a quiet stream — Al-Anon daily reflection for November 12

The Mask of Ego

Step 10 Step 11

Despite sincere efforts, we are not always able to separate God’s will from our own, but we can strive for improvement.

I am a master at dressing up my own will and calling it God's will. 'I feel led to tell you...' often really means 'I want to fix you.' I can convince myself that my manipulative plan is actually a divine inspiration because it leads to a 'good' result (sobriety, peace, order). But if the root of the action is fear or control, it isn't God's will, no matter how righteous it looks.

Separating the two is a daily struggle. The best litmus test I've found is the anxiety level. My will usually comes with a sense of urgency, tightness, and a need for a specific outcome. God's will usually comes with a sense of calm, clarity, and openness to timing. I can't always do it perfectly, but striving for improvement means pausing to check my motives. Am I trying to be the Higher Power, or am I listening to the Higher Power?

When I feel a 'spiritual nudge' to do something for someone else today, I can pause and ask: 'If I do this, and they don't appreciate it or change, will I be resentful?' If the answer is yes, it's likely my will, not God's. I will wait until my motive is cleaner.

Today’s Reminder

Urgency is usually the ego in disguise.

Carry this peace in your pocket.

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Curated by members of the Al-Anon community for Daily Growth, LLC. Grounded in the Twelve Steps and the contemplative tradition of Al-Anon.

Reflections on Step 10