Al-Anon daily reflection ·

The Illusion of Control in Service

Our groups, as such, ought never be organized; but we may create service boards or committees directly responsible to those they serve.

Paths to Recovery, p. 212

My history with Tradition Nine is complicated because my chief defect is control. For years, I approached Al-Anon service like I approached my family: believing that if I wasn't the one running things, they would fall apart. I volunteered for every board, every chair, and every long-term commitment, not out of spiritual health, but out of a deep, driving fear of chaos. This meant my service was rarely joyful; it was burdensome and exhausting.

The Tradition's counsel against organizing the groups themselves is a direct challenge to my need to control the outcome. We may create service boards, but they must be directly responsible to those they serve, not to the ego of the person running them. This structure costs me the illusion of safety, but it gives me back my time and my energy. More importantly, it forces me to trust the wisdom of the group conscience, which is a collective expression of a Higher Power I cannot see or command.

Practice

If I am currently holding a service position, I can review my tasks today and delegate one responsibility to another willing member. I will focus on empowering them rather than correcting their method.

Today’s Reminder

True service creates freedom; controlling service creates exhaustion.

More on service

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Written by people with lived experience of someone else’s drinking who practice the Twelve Step program of recovery. Published by Daily Growth, LLC.

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