The Tool Box of Growth
But it gives us the tools to deal with our problems and to continually work to improve ourselves.
The beautiful promise of recovery is not that all problems disappear, but that we are no longer empty-handed when they arrive. Before Al-Anon, my only tool was control, which always made problems worse. Now, I have a fully stocked toolbox: powerlessness, inventory, forgiveness, prayer. Step Ten demands that I actually use them.
It means not just having the tools, but applying them continually to improve myself. When a problem arises, I now have a spiritual process: Take a breath, turn it over, and ask what I missed in my recent inventory. This cost me my ability to blame others because it places the focus squarely back on my own response and improvement. The ongoing challenge is choosing the effort of using the tool over the comfort of the familiar defect.
Today, when I face a minor irritation, I will mentally label it: 'This is an opportunity to use a tool.' I will choose one tool (e.g., Detachment, Sponsorship) and consciously apply it instead of reacting.
