Redefining Meditation
What is meditation? Al-Anon leaves that a question open for each of us to answer in our own way.
For a long time, I thought meditation meant emptying my mind completely. Since my mind is usually a hamster wheel of obsession about the alcoholic's choices, I felt like a failure every time I tried. I would sit for thirty seconds, think about the laundry or an argument, and conclude, 'I can't do this.' This black-and-white thinking is typical of how I approach life—if I can't do it perfectly, I shouldn't do it at all.
Al-Anon gives me permission to define meditation in a way that works for me. It doesn't have to be a lotus position or a blank mind. Sometimes meditation is walking around the block and noticing the trees. Sometimes it is listening to a song and really hearing the lyrics. The goal isn't to stop thinking; it's to shift my focus from the problem to the Power. When I lower the bar, I actually step over it. I stop fighting my own mind and start befriending my spirit.
I can try a 'sensory meditation' today. For two minutes, I will focus entirely on one sense—what I hear, or the texture of the object in my hand. When my mind wanders to problems, I will gently label it 'thinking' and return to the sensation.
