Asking for Rejection
Admitting our faults to another person may seem like asking to be rejected.
I've been sitting with why Step Five feels so terrifying. It's not just vulnerability – I've been vulnerable at meetings. It's not just sharing mistakes – I've admitted mistakes before. The terror comes from something deeper: this feels like deliberately asking someone to reject me.
Admitting our faults to another person may seem like asking to be rejected. Yes. That's exactly what it feels like. I'm going to sit down with someone and methodically list everything wrong with me. How could they not reject me after that? How could anyone accept me knowing all of this?
But this fear keeps me stuck. As long as I believe sharing my faults equals asking for rejection I'll never do Step Five. I'll carry the burden alone forever. The program asks me to risk the rejection. To trust that honest sharing leads to connection not disconnection.
When fear of rejection keeps me from Step Five, I can name the fear directly to my sponsor: This feels like asking you to reject me. Speaking the fear often diminishes its power. And their response – assurance that they won't reject me – can give me courage to proceed.
