God's Way and Pace
We learn to trust God's way and pace as we go about our business.
Three months ago I prayed Step Seven on my obsessive worry. I've been asking God to remove it ever since. Daily. Sometimes hourly. And I'm still worrying. About my adult children. About money. About health. About things that haven't happened and might never happen. Where is the removal I keep asking for? Am I praying wrong? Is God ignoring me?
We learn to trust God's way and pace as we go about our business. God's way and pace - not my way and pace. I wanted the worry removed immediately through one perfect prayer. But God's way seems to be gradual. The worry is still here but it doesn't consume me as completely. I catch myself worrying and can sometimes stop. The pace is slower than I demanded but maybe God knows something about timing I don't.
My sponsor - eighteen years in Al-Anon - told me she's been asking God to remove her catastrophic thinking for over a decade. It's diminished but not disappeared. She keeps asking while trusting God's pace. That kind of trust when nothing dramatic changes - when God's way looks different than what I expected - that's what I'm learning to practice.
When frustration hits because my defect is still here after praying, I can stop and list three small changes out loud: I notice it sooner now. I feel its cost more. Sometimes I catch myself. Then say: God, I trust Your pace.
