Old Behaviors Stay
Even after repeatedly praying for their removal, we will find that old behaviors and thinking may stay with us.
I prayed Step Seven on my catastrophic thinking six months ago. I've asked God repeatedly to remove it. Daily prayers. Specific requests. Genuine cooperation. And this morning I woke up spinning worst-case scenarios about my daughter's job search. The same old thinking pattern. Still here. Still operating. I wanted to give up entirely.
Even after repeatedly praying for their removal we will find that old behaviors and thinking may stay with us. Will stay. Not might. Not occasionally. Will stay. This reality check was what I needed to hear. I've been judging my Step Seven work by whether the defect disappears. But the program is telling me old behaviors stay even after repeated prayer. That's not failure - that's normal.
The catastrophic thinking is still here but something has changed. I catch myself sooner now. The spiral doesn't consume my whole day like it used to. I can interrupt it sometimes with a slogan or a prayer. The old behavior stays but my relationship to it is shifting. God's removal is working more slowly than I demanded but more thoroughly than I expected. The behavior persists while gradually losing its power over me.
When the defect I've prayed about repeatedly is still active, instead of despair I can notice what's changed: Do I catch myself sooner? Does it last less time? Can I interrupt it sometimes? Write down three subtle shifts. These prove God is working even while old behaviors stay.
