Acting As If

I struggled with the Higher Power concept. I wanted to believe—I saw others' faith bringing them peace—but I just couldn't get there. My mind rebelled against the idea. It felt like pretending, like lying to myself. How could I work a program based on something I didn't genuinely believe?

The suggestion to act 'as if' felt revolutionary. I didn't have to force belief I didn't feel. I could simply act as if I believed and see what happened. I could pray even while doubting prayer worked. I could turn things over even while skeptical about where they were going. I could follow the suggestions even without complete faith in the outcome.

Acting 'as if' took the pressure off. I wasn't pretending—I was experimenting. I was willing to try something new even without certainty it would work. And something unexpected happened: the actions themselves began to shift something in me. When I acted as if I could trust my Higher Power, I started feeling more trusting. When I acted as if turning things over worked, I started experiencing the relief of letting go.

Belief followed action rather than preceding it. I didn't have to achieve perfect faith before I could benefit from the program. I just had to be willing to act as if I believed, and through that practice, actual belief began to grow. The willingness to try was enough to begin.

If I'm struggling with belief today, I can simply act as if. I can pray as if prayer works. I can turn things over as if my Higher Power can handle them. I can work the program as if it will help. The actions themselves may create the belief I seek.