What I Almost Missed
When awakening is slow, internal and quiet, it can often be overlooked.
This morning I was sharing about my life with a friend, and I casually mentioned that I no longer feel the urge to check my partner's phone. Her eyes widened. "Do you realize how enormous that is?" she asked, genuinely astonished. And honestly, I hadn't. The absence of that compulsive need had become so quietly ingrained that I'd forgotten the constant anxiety and suspicion that once drove me to snoop.
I’d been so focused on anticipating some grand, dramatic transformation that I was overlooking the subtle miracles unfolding daily. Now, I notice I don't rehearse conversations endlessly before I have them. I can tolerate uncertainty, letting situations unfold without spiraling into panic. Setting boundaries with a simple "no" no longer requires elaborate justification. Most powerfully, I'm learning to sit with my own emotions, rather than perpetually trying to manage everyone else's.
These profound shifts occurred so gradually, so internally, that they began to feel like they had always been part of me. Yet, they weren't. I've slowly awakened into a new way of being, and because these changes were quiet and deeply personal, I nearly missed them entirely. It took a friend's outside perspective to illuminate the true extent of what had transformed within me. I am now more attuned to these quiet transformations, recognizing the immense power in what felt like small, insignificant changes.
Today, I will take a quiet moment to acknowledge one small, internal shift I've made, recognizing it as growth rather than simply an absence of old patterns.
